Three years ago my world unexpectedly turned upside down leaving me alone in a country I barely knew and shifting to an entirely different city where I knew even less people. I am still to this day trying to figure out if that decision was a good or bad one. That first year, I was incredibly lucky to have a client of mine to tell me not to worry and my life was going to change. Having nothing to loose because I already felt I had lost everything, I trusted him completely and he was right. 2016 was year which seemed like a blur to me as I hopped in and out of countries endlessly working while also trying to adapt to my new life in Mumbai.

2017 was even harder, starting with the first four months of endless health complications which left me with the second half of the year recovering physically and mentally from all I had endured. Training my athletes or a workout for myself would take my body one to two full days to recover. The love for my work and training was I had at this point, and even that was slipping away because of my health. 

Retreating into my own little world, trying to heal and deal with the day to day life of complete loneliness, no help or real support and the physical issues my body gone through, left me on the ledge by the end of 2017. There were just enough few good things which happened that gave me a glimmer of hope to keep me going. From finally making a friend I could trust to taking up yoga and began writing poetry and a novel, I forged on. 

I have taken 2018 has been the year of acceptance for me. Surrendering to the hard realities of life and being realistic about what my life is. That is a hard pill to swallow. I slowly began to feel and see the shifts. For as much as I do speak up and speak out, I keep quiet about  is ten fold. So much I have learned through heartache, love, lies and deceit. 

It hasn't been until the past couple months I have been able to look at all I have gone through and look at with amazement, as I wonder who is this girl was made it through all that? That's pretty impressive. Until now, I never saw what I have done and lived through as anything extraordinary. I just did it to survive...and I did. I am changed. I honestly don't know if it is for the better.

Life is not easy for anyone. We all have own stories. I usually have been a fairly open person, but for what little I have shared over the past three years has only been the tip of an iceberg. So many times I wanted to fall apart and quit. Endless days and nights spent in my flat crying alone. The reality of life being more cruel than those horrible teenage years was something I was not prepared for or ever realistically considered. But just as life happens to us all, our experiences is what brings us to where we are today.

​So here we are.

For every sunrise, there is a sunset. Every sunset has a sunrise to follow. 
The dawn is breaking and I am here to take back the lead in my own show.